Review: Guardians of the Galaxy


I think my main problem with GotG was that it was trying to be different in light of Marvel’s other movie offerings.  This is not snarky, cool Iron Man, or badass, cool Captain America, or rip-rolling good times cool Avengers.  This is trying-to-be-funny cool Guardians, and sometimes, it works, but mostly the lines were too cheesy, missed their mark, fell flat.

Overly used 80s-90s pop music to make scenes more cool/emotional is not good.

They tried to force the group to become friends too quickly.  The bonding didn’t feel earned.  At one point, they actually all said to one other “You are my friend” or “… because we are friends”.  I think what the director was trying to do was tell us that this ragtag band who didn’t have friends before, suddenly became friends, and kinda’ each had their own moments where they sacrificed themselves for each other in an altruistic way – so you’d think “hey these guys could be just as cool as Iron Man, Thor, Capt America, Hulk, Black Widow, and what’s that arrow-shooting-guy’s name?”

Groot was really good, though it was alarming that movie-goers who thought he was endearing, sweet and heart-warming because he could shoot fireflies out of his body, give flowers to little girls that grew from his palm, and wrap himself into a tight ball around his buddies, forgot that he also had the most gruesome and brutal killscenes of any of the heroes.

Nice work Bradley Cooper, Rocket was awesome.

Nice work Benicio del Toro.

Marvel villains still suck.

The action scenes sucked.

Haha Cosmo.

Haha Howard Duck.

Okay I thought I wouldn’t compare it to the Guardians of the Galaxy comics, but it’s important I bring it up a bit.  Sad that they didn’t introduce Mantis (psychic), Phyla-Vell (superwoman-like), Adam Warlock (space magician), pretty much any of the more interesting, colourful characters of the modern GotG series – and I also missed the zany, time-space-universe bending plots that GotG got up to that the more staid Avengers and standard superhero stories didn’t want to touch.  Stuff like time-traveling to parallel universes and whatnot.

Instead, this movie was your standard space-but-not-really adventure with aliens-but-actually-just-humans-with-different-skin-colors against interchangeable-space-villain-with-creepy-make-up, and space could actually be land, and at the end, an Earth-like planet was in trouble.  I mean Guardians of the Galaxy was about saving the universe, not just a singular planet, right?  The ending was pretty much the same last-minute-Hail-Mary-play-by-heroes trope that Avengers used.  Bah.

Would still buy Groot and Rocket LEGO minifigs though.

Review: The Raid 2

Gareth Evans knows his kungfu.  Gareth Evans was very meticulous with the use of whooshes in the film each time a fist or foot or head connected with another body part. Whoosh.  Whoosh.  That made the kungfu more kungfu-ey.  It looked like the actors and kungfu people were really in love with the way they moved, that it looked like a supremely choreographed dance, more than a dirty brawl.  That’s good.

I don’t have much to say of the plot, it’s very Takeshi Kitano in its gangster trappings.  That means to say it’s very Asian gangster-y, though am not sure why there had to be Japanese yakuza in Indonesia but I guess Gareth Evans knows more about that than I do anyway.  I like that there were colorful assassins for our main hero to beat up, including a chick in shades wielding two unwieldy hammers – and that final fight – that is worth the ticket admission alone.  By the way, there’s gratuitous violence.  I also like that Gareth Evans was also messing about with the framing and composition of his shots, some looked dope.  Pushing his capabilities is good.

The Raid 2 is a different beast from The Raid.  Didn’t get me overly giddy with excitement and thrill as the first one did, and the plodding story bits just made me want for it to get on to the next fight scene, and the next.  But it is still one of the best kungfu movies ever.  If I was hosting a cool hang out at my cool home one cool night with some cool friends, I might turn to them and say “Hey, wanna’ see a cool action movie?”  They’d be a bit bored of the story bits, but they’d ooh and ahh with the fighting.

Like I said, Gareth Evans knows his kungfu.

Review: Transformers [whatever number] – Age of Extinction

Stand together or face extinction. As in the end of the Transformers franchise with this drivel.

I spent a lot of the movie wanting to leave.  But my friend was asleep and he said that we should just try and survive it.  But he got to sleep and I couldn’t, so I had to balk every 2 seconds at the shittiness that was flying off the screen.

Anyway, if you want to waste almost 3 hours of your life go ahead.  A lot is wrong with the film, most of the plot is incoherent, it feels like Michael Bay himself doesn’t give a shit about Transformers anymore, because he’s got Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles now.  I also wonder why he bothered to make this when Pain and Gain was so good.  Marky mark was also reading through his lines really fast, like he only had one expression: out of breath deadbeat dad.  I’m starting to think Marky mark thinks that if he wants to get dramatic and angry at someone in a movie, he must read his lines at them really fast.

“I ain’t got time for you, see how exasperated I am?  This is my exasperated voice.”

There’s also Steve Jobs, a really-too-young-to-be CEO Chinese chick who also happens to know kungfu, two dead weight characters (Marky mark’s daughter and her Irish boyfriend), the worst use of Ken Watanabe and John Goodman ever, Optimus Prime kills Kelsey Grammar, rides a T-Rex, and proceeds to fly into outer space signifying the mind-blowing end to a shitty film.  Optimus himself hates humans for pretty much most of the film, so I don’t blame him for wanting to get out of there.

Also Shia over Marky mark.

Review: Frozen



Finally caught Frozen on the plane.  It’s aight.  Overrated to be frank.  Thought that Anna had all the character development while Elsa had none.  I managed to hold off from hearing Let It Go this whole time, and when it finally got played, I was like “meh”, there are better composed musical centerpieces out there.  Lots of people travelling up the mountain for not much to happen, and then for them all to come back down the mountain again.  Why couldn’t they have just had everything take place on the mountain when everyone made the trip up?

I get that this is a slight tweak on the Disney formula – yeah the handsome prince may not necessarily be all that good, but come on, Anna still had to end up with someone at the end did she?  Couldn’t the sisters just like fuck off and do their own thing since they discovered their true love was the strongest?  Anyway, the sister act wasn’t all that convincing.

Review: Skyfall

When I came out of the cinema after watching Skyfall, I predicted that this would be a polarizing film.  Not everyone’s going to like it, not everyone’s going to get it.  It is slow, it is literary, it hasn’t got the bombastic driving action of Casino Royale, and it doesn’t have a lot sex.  In short, the hype machine and trailers played up a movie that was a different animal to what we actually got.  Which is fine, because I really, really enjoyed what I ended up watching.  Skyfall is the return of Bond, but not as you expect.  So read on to find out what I think, but it is heavy on spoilers.  So if you haven’t watched the film yet, do that first, and then come back to this.  And then tell me what you agree or disagree with, from my analysis. Continue reading

The Big Gap gabs about: Prometheus

Intrepid Big Gap bloggers Pearlyn and Junch discuss the shitstorm that just recently descended into cinemas everywhere, by the name of Prometheus.  You may have heard of it.  This is what we thought about it.  Excuse the language.  And be warned, spoilers. (Perr would like to add that all this took place on FBchat. It’s our IM special!) Continue reading